10 Most Ridiculous WWE Storylines

10 Most Ridiculous WWE Storylines Hand Young-Henry The year 2000 was a strange year for Mae Young One of the pioneers of women's wrestling in the 1940s, her career experienced a renaissance in the WWE

But the millennium was rough, as she found herself the targeted by the Dudley Boyz This culminated in the 77-year-old being powerbombed through a table in front of her boyfriend Hate it when that happens Said love interest was 29-year-old Mark ‘Sexual Chocolate’ Henry, and in a scientifically questionable turn, Young then announced that she was expecting Henry’s child The labour scene that followed was one of the most surreal scenes ever captured on camera

Young, still holding her trademark cigar and with her feet propped up on dustbins, strained in front of a gathered crowd until she finally gave birth After some questionable sound effects, what came out wasn’t a human baby, but a human hand, with no explanation as to why on earth two humans had sprouted out Thing from the Addams Family After that macabre, David Lynchian denouement, that seemed to be that, until the storyline was revisited 12 years later, when Mae returned to introduce Hand Young-Henry And just to make it even more bizarre, the 12-year-old mixed race hand baby was played by a full-grown white man The Gooker Already hotly anticipated, 1990’s Survivor Series was steeped in even more anticipation by a mysterious addition to the WWE a few months prior

Across America, WWE events began to be graced by the presence of a large, prehistoric-sized egg The egg was a hit amongst fans, who went crazy trying to guess its contents Theories varied from a World Champion set to debut in the WWE to a returning superstar or even some sort of Dinosaur-wrestler hybrid But it was nothing nearly that cool Instead, the 16,000 fans gathered in the Hartford Civic Center witnessed the egg break to reveal… The Gobbledy Gooker

Yep That The 6-foot human-sized turkey was such an anticlimax that he was instantly greeted by boos from the crowd The Gooker made a few more TV appearances, before being unceremoniously dumped, and cementing his legacy as one of the WWE’s biggest mistakes This was made more tragic by the fact that the man in the costume was Hector Guerrero, who had found success as a wrestler in Mexico, but never got a chance to bring his skills to the WWE

Bible Belt The eternally GIF-able WWE founder Vince McMahon was the mind behind many of the company’s most iconic moments, for better or worse As one of their most infamous wrestlers, he’s also had a starring role in countless storylines The strangest of these is hard to call, but even more baffling than his illegitimate leprechaun son has to be the time McMahon took on the almighty himself After a defeat to Shawn Michaels in 2006’s Wrestlemania 22, McMahon described his opponent’s win as an ‘act of God’ He rued God for always siding against him, and vowed that not even God could beat the McMahons

To prove this, he booked a tag team match for him and his son Shane to take on Michaels and God Yes, that God Who knew booking him was so easy The match took place four weeks later at Backlash, with God represented in the ring by a heavenly beam of light Its entrance was accompanied by a chorus of angels, until McMahon told it to stop, and inexplicably started to dance

If this weren’t offensive enough, the McMahons went on to win the match, which for obvious reasons was basically just a 2 v 1, meaning there was just no moral to the story Choppy Choppy The WWE is nothing without its fighters’ signature moves John Cena has his 5 Knuckle Shuffle and The Rock has Rock Bottom, but ex-adult movie star Val Venis’ real signature move seemed to be adultery This frequently got him into trouble, as was the case in 1998, when he slept with the wife of Yamaguchi-San The manager of the ‘Kaientai’ stable responded by chopping a large salami in half in front of Venis

One of the WWE’s many questionable stereotypes, Yamaguchi also issued the warning ‘I choppy choppy your pee pee’ I don’t think I have to translate that The following week, Venis was paired in a tag team with Taka Michinoku, until Michinoku swerved, turning on Venis and revealing that Mrs

Yamaguchi was in fact his sister Michinoku took the unconscious Venis backstage where he was stripped and tied up, and the RAW episode concluded with Yamaguchi about to dismember him A week later, Venis revealed that the sword had narrowly missed, because the lights had been cut by real-life penis amputee John Wayne Bobbitt Venis broke up with Mrs Yamaguchi, the feud ended and wrestling fans collectively tried to forget what they’d all seen

Moppy A 2001 Smackdown episode introduced one of the WWE’s stranger hall of famers It was a Hardcore Championship Match between reigning champion Test and Perry Saturn Getting creative, Saturn grabbed a mop for a weapon, which didn’t go fantastically The mop was kicked back into Saturn’s face, losing him the match and seemingly ending its fighting career, when it snapped in two Tragic how the mighty fall

But Saturn was loyal to his absorbent assistant, carrying it to the back to tend to it, as part of his questionable concussion storyline Saturn even ignored his girlfriend Terri Runnels to care for ‘Moppy’, and over the coming weeks they grew closer and closer Eventually, Terri posed Saturn the ultimatum ‘me or the mop’, where you’d expect the story would end But of course, this is WWE, and Saturn chose Moppy Over the coming weeks, Moppy fought with Saturn in the ring and the relationship appeared to grow beyond friendship

But this love story was cut short just 3 months after it started Moppy was kidnapped by Terri and her new squeeze Raven, who ultimately fed her to a wood chipper Eat your heart out, Shakespeare Dawn and Al Professional wrestling’s three-month rule dictates that any events which took place over three months ago should no longer be considered canon This allows for a lot of ‘experimentation’ in the storytelling, but was apparently thrown out for one of the WWE’s more puzzling storylines

Beginning in 2002, Dawn Marie was involved in a 9-month plot which saw her fall for Al Wilson, the real-life father of her onscreen rival Torrie Wilson Torrie was horrified to find the two in the shower, although Al was fully clothed for some reason Doubling up on water costs I guess She was even angrier at the news the two were engaged, but Dawn seemingly just had a thing for the Wilsons After telling Torrie she’d developed feelings for her, Dawn claimed that she’d call the wedding off if Torrie would go to her hotel room

Cue an entire Smackdown episode based around the divas making out, which of course culminated in Dawn breaking her promise Next, Dawn and Al tied the knot, inexplicably in their underwear, before the storyline concluded with the news that Al Wilson had passed away on his honeymoon due to rigorous intercourse What a climax Tim White’s Retirement In 2002, it seemed as though Tim White’s career as a WWE referee might be over During a Judgement Day event, a shoulder injury forced him out of the ring for two years

He made a triumphant return for Wrestlemania 20, but another injury to his shoulder forced him into permanent retirement But White’s part in the WWE didn’t end there, although it might have been better if it had Instead, in 2005, White appeared, first on pay-per-view, then online, in a series of segments following his retired life in a Rhode Island bar he’d opened The central conceit of the clips was that White’s life had been ruined by his injury, leading him to try each week to take his own life 2002 was a different time

In front of interviewer Josh Mathews, White made a string of increasingly elaborate and cartoonish attempts These varied from a noose to a vial of green liquid described as Mad Cow Disease’, but every attempt was ultimately revealed to have failed in the next instalment The tone-deaf skits culminated four months later, with White deciding instead to just shoot Josh Mathews, which he seemingly succeeded in so… happy ending? Salt and Pepper The WWE’s history of representing mental illness onscreen has been troublesome at the best of times This is best reflected in Al Snow’s late 90s schizophrenia storyline Snow began communicating with a mannequin head, which he replaced in 1999 with Pepper the chihuahua, who he also believed could talk to him

That was until Pepper was dognapped by rival wrestler Big Boss Man, who said he’d return the dog if Snow beat him in a Hardcore title match Snow won, but Big Boss Man kept Pepper captive Instead, Snow was invited to his hotel room to discuss the new terms of Pepper’s release over dinner But it soon became clear in a shock twist that Big Boss Man had no plans to return Pepper, as he revealed that the meal Snow had been eating was actually made of his beloved pooch The storyline was so unexpectedly dark that even 17 years later it was still causing offense

When Big Boss Man was set to be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame, Animal rights organisation PETA tried to shut down the ceremony, to honour the memory of Pepper – who, I should remind you, was not genuinely killed and eaten Trump vs O’Donnell In 2006, The View co-host Rosie O’Donnell criticised Donald Trump on his decision not to fire disgraced Miss USA Tara Conner He fired back in People Magazine by calling her ‘Little fat Rosie’ If you’re wondering how this is relevant, it’s because friend of the Donald and infamous cash-grabber Vince McMahon saw an opportunity to capitalise on the public feud In an awkward Monday Night RAW episode, McMahon introduced impersonators playing O’Donnell and Trump

Clearly an impartial host, McMahon introduces the former as ‘The Double Chin Diva’ and the latter as ‘From the hit show The Apprentice’ The two actors proceed to play out a cringeworthy fight in front of a frankly bemused and uninterested crowd Accompanied by a chorus of boos, the fight concluded with Trump hitting O’Donnell in the face with a cake, then performing a ‘Flying Hair Butt’ The future president ultimately won the fight, but historically, it’s gone down as a big loss for the WWE The real Trump made his official WWE debut the following year and is now an inducted hall of famer, while O’Donnell is strangely yet to make an appearance

Dr Heiney In 2005, commentator Jim Ross had to take some time off from the WWE to have a colonoscopy To explain the absence, a storyline was conceived in which Ross was fired from the WWE But, never ones to waste a good storyline, they also wrote Ross’ very real medical procedure into the show With Vince McMahon scrubbed up and filling in the role of surgeon, the 7-minute ‘Dr

Heiney’ segment was essentially just a collection of fart jokes After making a pass at his assistant, Nurse ‘Slobberknockers’, which I’m gonna go ahead and guess isn’t her real name, McMahon pulls a collection of strange objects out from between a fake pair of JR buttocks These varied from his famous barbecue sauce and an Oklahoma football helmet to more obscure sight gags McMahon also retrieved a hand, calling back to the equally questionable Mae Young storyline, and a replica of Ross’ own head, as an unsubtle way of saying he had his head up, er, there The scene concludes with JR being pushed off the operating table, before McMahon and the nurse climb on and start hooking up, with McMahon’s surgical gloves still on


Be the first to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.


This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.